Girls can be mean, spiteful, and malicious. I consider myself to be an expert on this very topic, as I have 5 sisters (no brothers). Growing up in a houseful of girls was complete and utter hell.
When my daughter was born, my heart broke a little for her. Growing up a girl is hard. In my opinion, boys are a lot more accepting of others. They seem to click with one another a lot easier than girls do. I remember high school vividly, and pray that my daughter does not have to endure some of the things that were said to me. Or endure similar taunts that I myself (I am ashamed to admit) cast upon other girls.
My daughter, Princess, started kindergarten this year. Already I have heard little comments that strike panic in me, for instance:
Those jeans make me look weird.
My friends think that outfit is stupid.
or the most heartbreaking of them all….
I don’t have any friends.
Since she is in kindergarten, she and her friends obviously are still learning how to handle more complex social situations. So, I have been trying to explain to her why those statements are wrong, and that sometimes people say mean things. It is hard to explain and even harder to understand. Especially when all you want to do is fit in. I get it.
Then, the Great Snow Boot Fight of 2011 broke out this morning. She FLAT OUT REFUSED to put her boots on. She told me that her friends would think she looked stupid and make fun of her. She would be the ONLY one wearing boots. I tried calmly to explain to her that since it SNOWED last night, I am guessing that most of her friends will be wearing their snow boots also. She was not convinced. Things got ugly….. and we both were crying by the time she left for school.
I have a real problem with this. Since we have already had snow this year, and she wore her boots with no problem, I am guessing that something has happened this week. She wore her boots earlier this week, but there wasn’t much snow on the ground. So, my assumption is that some catty little thing has made fun of her. Seriously?????…..ugh!
I have heard my kids make fun of people and I take that as an opportunity to explain to them why you shouldn’t treat people that way. How many other parents are doing the same?
Moms, please stop this cycle while you can!!! This crap shouldn’t be happening at all – least of all in KINDERGARTEN. What’s next – messages on the bathroom wall? Don’t let your daughter grow up to be a mean girl. And, more importantly, don’t let her grow up thinking that it is ok to take abuse like that from mean girls. Give your daughter the self-confidence to stand up for herself.
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